You You Yours: Owed to a junkie

You do not see, and if
You are lucky,
You make it impossible for others to see as well.

I see.

You have beauty, heart
You have hands that tell the tale, maybe
You are more than the junk and the lies and inability to see.
You are smart, still, under the scars
You forgot
You must work for what
You cannot smoke snort inject imbibe.

I know.

You dance with closed eyes and say
You know that expression kissed by God
You say take the best orgasm
You ever had… multiply it by a thousand, and
You are still nowhere near it

You say I will never know.

I agree.

You sing, she caught my eye, as
You walked on by
You shout, She could see from my face that I was
Fucking high.
You don’t think that you’ll see her again
You are sometimes prophetic.

I consider.

You rarely ask, but sometimes, Are
You like me?
You gotta do more, For
You, for me. This is your time, all right?
You take it. 

I reach.

You wanna try, If you wanna try There’s no worse
You could do
You can’t take me anywhere, I’ll take
You anywhere, but Oh!
You can’t stand me now, No,
You can’t stand me now.
You tried to pull the wool
You take all that they’re lending

I wasn’t feeling too clever
You needed mending…

I decide.

You hurt me and
You, and what
You want is no longer enough.
You call on me, God, mom, neighbors.
You lie.
You beg.
You cry.
You believe.

I leave.

This is not related to the last post. I reckon a good number of you will get the references. And it is true, the hotter they are, the harder you fall… Benicio, McGregor, Bale… [Now, gonna stop watching movies about junkies for a bit.]


About Amanda

I am repatriating expatriate trying to work it all out. Well, to work some of it out anyhow. I am writing here for sanity, focus and general over-sharing.
This entry was posted in Chasing the Life I was Supposed to Want, Life, Movies, Music, Relationships, true stories and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to You You Yours: Owed to a junkie

  1. thedatingleprechaun says:

    You hurting? frustrated?

  2. Joan says:

    Excellent writing. Nice construction and flow. I think I’m getting most of it, but the second to last line “You believe” is unclear…does it mean “you (falsely) believe”?

    • Amanda says:

      Hmmm…. could go either way.
      In the cycle everyone really wants to believe.

      Mostly, I think (t)he(y) believe/s.
      Which makes it an entirely different kind of lie, eh?

  3. tamara says:

    Perfect Amanda!

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